Halo: Legends

I'm going to go out on a limb and say that fans of the Halo series don't like this movie... or rather, series of shorts that seem like pilots for a TV series.
Now, I haven't looked it up yet, so I don't have data to back that assumption up... I can just assume so because of the fact THERE IS A FREAKING GENERIC ANIME VERSION FEATURING A SPARTAN NAMED 1337 AS THE GENERIC ANIME PROTAGONIST!
I've never played any game of halo, and I am a fan of anime and manga... But that... I can tell that was just wrong...

Here's a basic summary... It is a collection of stories in animated form in the Halo Universe. The first two are good, as they detail the origins of the Halo universe, about the Forerunners, the flood, the halos, the covenant and the humans... While it doesn't have especially good animation to it, it is still good.

The next one is... A samurai-anime-3D models run through a photoshop filter... thing... It just left me confused. I watched the video "The story thus far" that came with the Blu-ray, and I understand the majority of the story. However, the main character in this... samurai thing... is the Arbiter. Or, an Arbiter, if that's actually a title... Except I thought the story thus far said that was a title of disgrace... And yet he's a general and commands respect... Honestly I think that is pretty much in an alternate universe. A universe that likes the water color filter.

The next episode is probably the better of the bunch. It tells the short tale of a female spartan, also summarizing the spartan two project nicely. It is in an anime style, but it does work, and it looks cool here.

And then there's... 1337. Leet. Har har. Honestly, it juggles back and forth between a parody of animes and playing the genre of animation straight... The leader of the covenant (something about "truth") sounded like a generic anime villain, I was fully expecting him to say "After 50 years I am free! It is time to conquer earth!" like something straight out of the power rangers. The the monster... It looked like the main villain of the Digimon movie! (I'll probably review that later...) And the planet they were on had dinosaurs... that acted like dogs... with kids that were raised by an AI... and the two older kids being as strong as a spartan, if not stronger... It is a serious WTF. The action is cool but throughout it I'm so aware of how wrong it is. I could write an entire article on how to fix this mess, but I'll just keep it quick:
Either make the kids Spartans or Elites. Their strength and combat skills will make sense then. Why would the Elites team up at this point? I don't know, maybe this takes place after the treaty or maybe they're marooned and would agree to an alliance just to get off the planet. Honestly, whenever 1337 or some other Halo related thing isn't on screen this story feels like a pilot for a different show...

It is at this point I have to introduce a featuring of Fixer-sue: Walking out.
Generally, if you are so disgusted by a movie, or so bored by it that your arm chair is far more interesting, you'd turn off the movie or walk out of the theatre. As I am just a normal media blogger, and not a reviewer that actually gets paid, I won't be subjecting myself to pain for the entertainment of others. Which means I retain the ability to walk away from the movie.
Now, just because I haven't seen the whole movie does not mean I can't review it or give suggestions on how to fix it. To the contrary, walking away from the movie automatically means that it has very noticeable flaws, whether it be boredom or insulting whatever you hold dear.

For Helo Legends, I stopped watching the film when it got to the short "Be human." It was immediately after the anime thing and... Well, I was just too bored by it. I was much more entertained listening to "The Story So Far" than watching a lot of the shorts...

So here's how to fix the movie:
Make it about Master Chief.
Now, I know that there probably is a story in there about Master Chief... But it is too little too late. Master Chief is iconic of the Halo universe; I never played a single game and yet I know about him. Pushing him aside for 1337, some Arbiter in feudal covenant times, and a female spartan 2 who dies at the end of her story.
If you want to tell those stories, fine, but give a rhyme and reason for it... Have an outer story linking them together. Like if Master chief is looking into some crystal that tells the life of one of the Arbiters, or listening to some random Spartan telling exaggerated war stories, or actually talking with the female spartan.

In the film, there is also very little action. There is some here and there, but it is mostly drama... I'm not sure how many people play Halo for the drama. I can expect books to have that kind of drama, but a movie? I was fully expecting some much grander battles... After all, if you're going to make a game about a movie, you have to avoid giving the fans a reason to say:
"Why don't I just play the games?"

Now, if you're an extreme fan of halo's lore, and you can stomach the dumb parts, you'll probably enjoy this movie. If you are just a normal member of the viewing audience... look up "The Story So Far" for Halo on youtube or something... It's a lot better watch, and will actually make you want to go out and get one of the games. (Then again, if you have a console that can play Halo, you probably already own it.)


This has been Fixer Sue, and I highly doubt anyone will be bothered by this review.